WWE Monday Night Raw 12/24/12…Miracle on 34th Streetfight

I want to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas, and tonight is a special night.  Santa Claus will be our special guest host, and here he comes, celebrating with all of the good boys and girls, but Alberto Del Rio comes out crashing the tree, and hitting Santa Claus with his benz….OH MY GAWD!!!!!  Del Rio killed Santa!!!

EMTs are out, checking on Santa, and we even get a Moments Ago, and see Del Rio hitting Santa.  Now he can’t deliver the presents.

Santa gave the thumbs up, as he was being wheeled out to a commercial break.

All of the wrestlers are in the back, and we see Booker T make his way out, he says things don’t look good, but they all must band together, for the sake of Santa.  Here comes Alberto Del Rio.  Del Rio says it was an accident, everyone knows he drives out his car in his entrance, so it’s Santa’s fault for being in the way, even Cena can’t keep a straight face.  Before Santa lost consciousness, he made our main event.  Alberto Del Rio vs John Cena, in a Miracle on 34th Streetfight.

Cody Rhodes is making his way to the ring, and will face Kane, now.

Kane wins with a Chokeslam through an exposed turnbuckle.

An 8-Diva Santa’s Helpers Tag match is up next.

The team of Layla, Kaitlyn, Alicia Fox, and Natalya are facing the team of Eve Torres, Rosa Mendes, Tamina Snuka, and Aksana, now.

Kaitlyn, Alicia Fox, Natalya, and Layla won the match when Kaitlyn hit her Gutbuster, pinning Eve Torres.

Still to come tonight, a Miracle on 34th Streetfight between Alberto Del Rio Vs John Cena, and for the first time ever, a Jack-Frost Lumberjack Match between Sheamus Vs Big Show.

Coming up next, an update on Santa Claus.  Yes folks, an honest update on Santa, after being hit by one of Alberto Del Rio’s cars.

AJ Lee and Dolph Ziggler are lounging around a fire, on the floor.

They are watching TLC, the part where AJ threw Cena off a ladder.

Earlier tonight, Alberto Del Rio “accidentally” runs over Santa Claus.

Matt Striker gives us an update on Santa Claus, there is no update but we will keep you informed throughout the night.  Brilliant.

Our Lumber Jack-Frost match is up next.

Sheamus beats Big Show with a Brogue Kick, and we of course get chaos among the lumberjacks, as they all get into the ring, and pound each other.  But the faces all celebrate with Sheamus, after the match.

Now we see footage from Tribute to the Troops, with Miz TV, with The Muppets.

Still to come tonight, a Miracle on 34th Streetfight between John Cena Vs Alberto Del Rio.

David Otunga is out, and he tells us we haven’t heard all of the facts yet, concerning Alberto Del Rio.  We are judging, because the truth is Del Rio was doing his contractual obligations, while Santa was trespassing.

Zack Ryder comes out to say he has a match with Woo….Woo….Woo….You Know It.

Ryder wins the match with a Rough Ryder.  As Cole put it, Zack now gets his Christmas gift from his Dad.

Booker T and Teddy Long are watching backstage, Vickie Guerrero is on vacation.  Brad Maddox comes in, and he still wants a contract, despite losing.  But in the spirit of Christmas, he will give him another chance.  It will be great television, and all Brad has to do is beat one of Santa’s elves, can you dig that, sucka?

Our next match is a tag match with Antonio Cesaro and Wade Barrett taking on The Miz and Kofi Kingston.

Miz and Kofi wins with a Skull Crushing Finale, Miz pinning Barrett.

Tonight, we will have a Miracle on 34th Streetfight between John Cena Vs Alberto Del Rio, and next, we will get an update on Santa Claus.

More Dolph Ziggler and AJ Lee moment, AJ gave Dolph a Money in the Bank briefcase, how did she know he wanted it?

She is now wearing his shirt.

We see what happened earlier tonight, with Alberto Del Rio hitting Santa Claus.

The latest update is not alot to report.  My gawd!!

Brad Maddox comes out to sing Santa Claus is coming to town.  Okay, actually, Brad Maddox is coming to Raw. 

His match is next.

Oh boy, Brad is facing one of Santa’s elves all right, this elf is named Great Khali.

Khali pins him with a Spinebuster.  Brad still does not have a WWE contract.

The WWE champion, the Grinch himself, CM Punk is out next.

Punk is still on crutches, how he will be ready for his title match on January 7th is beyond me, but we’ll go with it.

Punk makes fun of Khali’s singing.  Christmas has been ruined.  For once, it’s not his fault, he’s not talking about earlier but rather a developing situation, our reigning WWE Champion is unfit to compete tonight.  Boo the man responsible, his name is Ryback.

Punk can’t even walk without using crutches, and now Ryback has ruined Christmas, and Hanukkah.  So what do we do about Ryback?  Do we punish him?  No, do we fire him?  No, do we suspend him?  No, you reward him for what he seems to think is a WWE Title match.  He lives in his own dream world, he can see his point if Punk had something to do with Maddox, and The Shield, but there is no proof of that.

So here we are, with the WWE Champion unfit to compete, while everyone else can go off to the local bar, and drink off your Christmas.

Paul Heyman has the mic now, and he says we don’t boo him.  CM Punk has been our WWE Champion for 400 consecutive days.  And for those 400 consecutive days, Punk has been a victim of a conspiracy of getting the WWE Title off his hands.  You don’t believe him?  Take a look at Ryback, he has received 2 straight title opportunities, and on both occasions, he has failed.

No matter how you look at it, CM Punk is better than Ryback, because he is the best in the world.

Feed Me More….

Here comes Ryback.

Heyman threatens a lawsuit against Ryback, but Ryback already has what he wants, and that is a title shot in two weeks, if Punk is able to, he will get what he originally was supposed to get….Tables, Ladders, and Chairs.

TLC!!

TLC!!

TLC!!

Still to come tonight, Miracle on 34th Streetfight between John Cena Vs Alberto Del Rio.

When we come back, we have Daniel Bryan taking on Damien Sandow.

Daniel wins the match with a No Lock, making Damien tap out.

Our next match is a 12 Days of Christmas 12 Man Tag, between 3MB, Prime Time Players, and Tensai taking on Brodus Clay, Santino Marella, Tyson Kidd, Justin Gabriel, and The Uso Brothers.

The Uso’s Kidd, Gabriel, Brodus, and Santino win with a Uso Splash, on Heath Slater.

Tonight, a Miracle on 34th Streetfight, with John Cena Vs Alberto Del Rio.

Next, another grand Santa update.

Striker tells us that Santa has taken a turn for the worse, and they are sending him to the emergency room as we speak.  But we hear Santa’s heartbeat humming “Santa Claus is Coming To Town”, so it appears he is fine, and is now able to make his trek tonight to give the little boys and girls their presents.

Our main event, John Cena Vs Alberto Del Rio in a Miracle on 34th Streetfight is now.

Cena wins with an Attitude Adjustment, after Santa comes back and gives Alberto Socko, it appears he is all about giving peace to “Mankind”.

Cena celebrates with Santa to end the show, bang, bang.

Kevin’s Thoughts:

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to anyone reading this blog.  Have a safe, and enjoyable day.

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About Kevin Gillman
I have had this blog up for a few years, writing every Monday night and anytime in between. Always check the site out, send me a comment on what your thoughts are for the current state of wrestling.

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