WWE Monday Night Raw 7/6/15….Chi-Town Rumble

After last week’s horrible Raw, we see a recap of the biggest problem, Seth Rollins giving prizes away like he is a game show host.  Our WWE Champion, ladies and gentlemen.

Here Comes The Pain, in Chicago.

We are 13 days away from Battleground, and we hear from…

My name is Paul Heyman, and I am the advocate for the 9th mayor of Suplex City….BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK LESNAR!!!!

It come to his attention that Seth Rollins and his merry men believe he is still in Tokyo, Japan.  Which means you can put a title on anybody, even a shmuck Justin Bieber-look-a-like, like Seth Rollins who can luck his way to the championship.

Let him put it like this, his client is a God, but not a God of religion, or a God of family, or a God of morality, but rather a God of retribution.

This is his sword, and allow Heyman to remind us he took the streak away from The Undertaker.

The crowd boos him, and Heyman brings up don’t boo the advocate.

But when his client took The Undertaker’s streak at Wrestlemania, he didn’t respect Undertaker, but he also didn’t disrespect The Undertaker.

Now when his client took John Cena to Suplex City, Brock didn’t have any respect for John Cena, but he also didn’t disrespect Cena, he wanted the WWE Championship.

His client didn’t respect Roman Reigns, when he showed up what insufferable pain really is, but he also didn’t disrespect Reigns.

Now, Seth Rollins broke the 11th commandment, thou shall not provoke Brock Lesnar.

Seth Rollins didn’t provoke Lesnar twice, like taking the WWE Championship at Wrestlemania, he also provoked him the night after Wrestlemania, when he went in thinking he’d have a rematch, and then walk away.

But he also provoked Lesnar a third time a few weeks ago, when a bunch of hooligans attacled The Beast Incarnate, but they let a Beast breathe.

This is the point where Heyman is supposed to sell us on the PPV, in 13 days at Battleground.  His client Brock Lesnar will get his hands on the reigning, defending undisputed World Heavyweight Championship, and become the new champion, but that beating to Suplex City begins tonight, in the cathedral hall of Suplex City, in the All-State Center in Chicago, Illinois.

Now, we hear the WWE World Champion will be here tonight.

We hear chants of Suplex City, and since the champ will be here, Brock Lesnar isn’t going anywhere tonight.

So someone needs to tell the champ, Brock is here to fight.

Cole, JBL, and Byron join us for the show.  Kane is on his trip in Hawaii, and we see awful pictures from that trip.

Seth gave J & J Security a new Cadillac, and we see their road trip they went to.

Big Show Vs Ryback, one on one is now.

The Miz was in commentary during the match the entire time, egging both men on to beat each other up.  The match ends in a DQ for Ryback, but Miz attacks both men.  But it doesn’t work.

Also, Chicago fans said Cleveland sucks at Miz, how rude.

Shellshock, and a Chokeslam, but Ryback hits a Meathook on Show and is left standing.

Feed Me More….

Tonight, another John Cena United States Open Challenge.

More footage of Kane in Hawaii, and footage from earlier today, J & J Security are in Chicago.

Divas action now, with Brie Bella Vs Paige.

Brie wins with a X-Factor, after Nikki and Alicia distracted Paige long enough, but we see a Rack Attack and an Axe Kick, and no divas are helping out Paige.

Footage from last week over Reigns and Wyatt.

Roman Reigns Vs Sheamus is up now.

Sheamus wins by countout when we hear Bray Wyatt’s music, and we think Bray is making his way, but it’s Luke Harper instead and Roman nails him with a Superman punch.

But Bray shows up on-screen, laughing and just says anyone but you.

And as Sheamus was celebrating over his fluke win, here comes Randy Orton.

They fight in the barricade, and move to the ring, Orton hits a RKO.

13 days, these two face off at Battleground.

HHH is on the phone, and we see the champ and his entourage show up.

Seth is smiling, and HHH informs him that Lesnar is here, and will fight him, so what will he do about it?

Seth is very confident about Battleground, so HHH suggests he stays away from Brock and let him steam, and make a mistake.  But he is Brock Lesnar, that won’t happen, so Seth has to intentionally provoke Brock Lesnar, and show him why he is the man.  Rollins will call out The Beast.

Rusev and Summer Rae are in the ring.

Our USA loves opportunities.  He loves the opportunities his new love, Summer Rae gave last Thursday night on Smackdown that he apologizes himself.

He apologize…

The crowd wants Lana, but he gives us Summer.

He won’t apologize for wasting a year of his life to Lana, and he won’t apologize that these guys took Lana on our level, and he won’t apologize for being better looking, more intelligent, and more passionate than Dolph Ziggler.

Summer tells us we should be showing respect for this man for what he deserves.

Rusev kisses Summer’s hand, and here comes Ziggler and Lana.

Rusev is distorted, because everything he has gotten from WWE is due to Lana.  Deep down, he knows this, and you know that song hebutchered a few weeks ago, yo don’t know what you got, til it’s gone?  Well brother, it’s gone and Ziggler found her.

They make out, and now Summer and Lana are about to fight, but Rusev nails Ziggler with his crutch, and kicks him with his cast.

Rusev talks trash, but Ziggler fight back.  But Rusev has the final say.

Officials check on Ziggler, with Rusev admiring his work.

Moments ago, we see what just saw, Rusev is healthy now, and he used that against Ziggler.

Ziggler is wheeled out by EMTs, with Lana by his side.

We go from that, to the inspirational Bo Dallas!!

That was a horrible thing we just saw what happened to Dolph Ziggler.  Just goes to show bad things happen to bad people, and good things happen to good people.  Good people like him, and all you have to do is BO-lieve.

Oh boy, his opponent is Dean Ambrose.

Dirty Deeds, that is all she wrote.

BO-Lieved, and he lost.

Brock Lesnar is here, Seth Rollins is here, Kane is vacationing in Hawaii, and J & J Security cruised in their Cadillac.

Tonight, Seth Rollins calls out The Beast.

Bad News Barrett Vs R-Truth, oh boy.

Barrett wins with Bull Hammer.

Seth Rollins is heading to the ring, next.

Earlier tonight, Rusev attacked Ziggler, and he has damaged his throat.

Here comes Seth Rollins.

Oh good lord, we see the car come out.

Rollins, J & J have axe handles.

HHH and Stephanie chose Brock Lesnar to be his opponent at Battleground, because they know what we will all find out, he is the undisputed future, and the future is now.

He reunited The Authority, and they laid out Brock Lesnar like a whimpering dog.

He conquered the conqueror, he set fire to Supex City.  And at Battleground, he will burn it down the ground.

That Neanderthal can’t match Rollins’ intelligence.

We see footage of The Authority attacking Lesnar.

Suplex City chants, and Seth tells us to chant that all we want, but he is the man.  He reunited The Authority, he defeated Brock at Wrestlemania, and there is nobody else who can beat him.  He walks in to Battleground WWE World Champion, and he will walk out Battleground as WWE World Champion.

Now Paul Heyman brings up the 11th commandment, never intentionally provoke Brock Lesnar.  So Brock, he is wondering, are you the man Paul Heyman says you are, or are you Heyman’s bitch?

Here comes the pain.

Brock has some axe grinders himself, and he smashes the car with them.  He is goating The Authority in while doing it, which is hilarious.

Brock goes after Noble’s arm, and breaks it, he sends Mercury into the car with a suplex, and now it’s just Lesnar and Rollins.

Yeah, Rollins runs away like a bitch.

13 nights, the WWE Title will be Brock’s.

John Cena’s United States Open Challenge match, tonight.

Moments ago, we see the car has crashed.

The Lucha Dragons Vs The New Day is up now.

New Day wins the match, and we heard Primetime Players talking during commentary.  In 13 days, Tag Titles are on the line in a 3-on-2 Handicap match.

Who answers the opportunity against John Cena?  We find out, next.

We are in Chicago, and we find out “Stone Cold” Steve Austin is on the cover of WWE2K16.

John Cena is ready, and in 13 days, he will be ready to face Kevin Owens.

We see footage of Owens Vs Balor this past Saturday morning in Japan, at Beast in the East.

Cena thanks the chants, it seems the Chicago fans are a bit upset.  Is that because Kevin Owens lost the NXT Title this past Saturday morning?  Never fear, because The Champ Is Here.

We will see a title match tonight, and Cena has had many memorable title matches.  Some advice to the man who comes through the curtain, be prepared for a battle.

Kevin Owens comes out.

This is the worst part of the show, because it’s the same crap coming out of Cena’s mouth, but he needs the United States Championship, he was willing to wait, but let’s do this tonight, right here, right now.

Cesaro shows up.

Nobody wants to hear Owens cry about Saturday’s loss, so step aside, because if anyone needs a title shot, it’s Cesaro.

Owens is jealous because Cesaro had Cena beat, and was about to do something Owens can’t do, make Cena tap.  So get out of the ring, because now it’s Cesaro Vs Cena.

And that’s our main event.

Cena wins with an AA on the middle rope.  Both men threw everything they could, and the match felt something special.

Kevin Owens shows up, and tries to give Cena a Pop-Up Powerbomb, but Cena counters it with an AA.  We end the show seeing the carnage Brock Lesnar left with the Cadillac tonight.

Kevin’s Thoughts:

Tonight’s show was a million times better than last week, but then again, after last week, anything would be better.

We had Brock crush a car, and crush the spirits of a young champion.

We also saw a very good main event, and whether you like the man or not, John Cena has made the US Title relevant again, and if Kevin Owens wins, we need to see more open challenges.

I expect to see an official contract signing next week, what were your thoughts of the show?  Send them to me.

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About Kevin Gillman
I have had this blog up for a few years, writing every Monday night and anytime in between. Always check the site out, send me a comment on what your thoughts are for the current state of wrestling.

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