WWE Monday Night Raw 8/1/16….HotLanta!!
August 1, 2016 Leave a comment
Tonight, Monday Night Raw is in Atlanta, Georgia. Seth Rollins and Finn Balor are in the house, these two men face off at Summerslam, for the coveted WWE Universal Championship.
“the Beast Incarnate” Brock Lesnar is also in the house, what are his thoughts about facing Randy Orton at Summerslam?
Raw is now.
The new entrance theme song is playing.
We are live in Atlanta, Georgia. Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, and Corey Graves welcome us to the show.
“The Boss” Sasha Banks kicks off the show.
In 3 weeks, rematch for the WWE Women’s Title, Banks Vs Charlotte.
The crowd chant she deserves it, and Sasha tells us it’s about time Raw kicks off with a Bank Statement, and she is the new Women’s Champion.
Last year, at NXT Takeover: Brooklyn, people were talking about Bayley and “The Boss” because they stole the show. But they didn’t just steal it, they owned the show.
And things stay the same, because at Summerslam, she plans on keeping her Women’s Title, from Charlotte.
Here comes Charlotte.
You tapped out chants are going on.
Charlotte is mad, she looks a little different, without the Women’s Championship, as Sasha reminds her. Dana Brooke isn’t with Charlotte.
Charlotte doesn’t need Dana to beat her, she doesn’t need her father to beat her. But at Summerslam, Charlotte will beat Sasha all by herself. She was the very best for over 300 days. Sasha was just a one night stand.
Charlotte is the daughter of Ric Flair, if it wasn’t for a one night stand, Charlotte wouldn’t even be here.
Chris Jericho comes out, telling us to be quiet.
Brilliant.
He tells Sasha to be quiet, and says she is a disrespectful punk. Charlotte is royalty, look at her lineage. She looks like a princess. She may be Ric Flair’s daughter, but she has accomplished more than Ric Flair has ever done. Who has Ric Flair beat? But he knows Charlotte will beat her.
Now Jericho asks Sasha what makes her a “boss”? She is the boss of only purple-haired snot nosed stupid idiots.
But Sasha isn’t a boss, she is a brat.
Enzo Amore comes out, and he is a certified G, and a bona fide stud. And you can’t teach that. Badda-Boom, realest guy in the room….HOW YA DOIN’?
Sasha, for real, how ya doin’, and he kisses her hand.
More brilliance from Enzo. Enzo likes to do things on his own sometimes. He is a G, and she is a BOSS, actually BUASS.
Enzo likes to make a certified bank, how ya doin?
Charlotte tells Enzo word is his life is described as one word….
Let me spell it out for ya….
Enzo talks about Jericho’s speak, comparing it to texting someone, and you see the three dots, but he never hits send.
Listen here, you hip-hop hobbit. Jericho tells him you better watch it.
He said you better watch it.
Watch what?
IT!!
Watch Enzo’s mouth? For him to speak is like washing his hiney before he poops. He calls Jericho Bon Jovi. You can’t turn back time, if he could, he would stop him from buying that horrible scarf.
How ya doin’?
It’s Mick Foley time.
Mick does care, and he may not be the BOSS, but he is their boss. That man is Enzo Amore, he is a certified G, but they both wear leopard.
Both Enzo and Sasha appear on his new reality show “Holy Foley”, and Sasha set the bar high last week, by being the new Women’s Champion. And we are going to have Charlotte and Sasha compete in the ring again, tonight.
It will be a mixed tag match of Jericho and Charlotte Vs Sasha and Enzo. It won’t only appear right here, in Atlanta, Georgia. But it will be right now.
Kevin Owens joins us at commentary.
Charlotte and Jericho won the match with a little help from Dana Brooke, and hits Natural Selection.
After the match, Jericho hits a Codebreaker, and here comes Big Cass to aid his buddy.
I am guessing we will lead to Enzo and Cass Vs Jericho and Owens match at Summerslam. I have no issue with that.
We will hear from Finn Balor, tonight.
Braun Strowman is about to destroy Evan Anderhall, and he is doing this because he gets $1,000 for just showing up. And he gets $5,000 if he wins.
Reverse Chokeslam, Evan picks up the $1,000 at least.
Steph and Mick segment. She is in favor of the mixed tag match.
Mark Henry shows up.
Mark is excited about the Summer Olympics, and he is excited about “The New Era”, but he is hungry, and he is ready to open up more additions to The Hall of Pain.
Steph and Mick want him to be a mentor, and Mark interrupts this, saying she is wrong. He is a 2-time World Champion, and he is a 2-time Olympic athlete.
Foley suggests he gets an US Title match against Rusev.
Golden Truth in action, tonight.
Golden Truth Vs Shining Stars is now.
Golden Truth loses, so Shining Stars wins, because Truth cares more about Pokemon Go than his own partner.
Oh boy, hour one has sucked tonight. The last 2 hours needs to pick up.
Finn Balor is next.
Tonight, Brock Lesnar will speak, setting up his match with Randy Orton.
Michael Cole introduces us to Finn Balor.
Cole brings up Balor was a surprise choice as a first round pick in the draft, yet last week, he proved his value. Balor starts to explain things, but here comes Seth Rollins.
Seth tells Cole to take a hike. He wants us to give an ovation to Finn Balor. Finn was a former NXT World Champion. He wasn’t the first World Champion, but that was Rollins. Finn was a first round pick in the draft, but Seth was the number one pick overall. Finn was very admirable in beating Roman Reigns last week, but he beat him in his first night back from coming back with an injury.
Finn asks him if he is done, he is right about everything, but Finn will beat Seth at Summerslam, and being the first WWE Universal Champion.
That amuses Seth, that is like saying the Atlanta Braves are going to be World Series champions, it just won’t happen.
We get Tomahawk chants, and Seth tells us they horrible. Finn had a great legacy in NXT, but he is the man.
Finn brings up everywhere he has wrestled, he has had guys think they were the man, but he beat them, and became the man.
Seth said they have never faced each other, why don’t he get a good seat to watch him face his buddy Sami Zayn later tonight.
Finn said they have had many similarities, but he never had anything handed to him like Seth had at Summerslam.
Rollins said he has never had anything handed to him, and Finn said the one thing he will have handed to him is when Finn kicks his ass.
Seth tries to attack him, but Finn counters with a kick.
Three weeks away, the first WWE universal Champion is crowned. Rollins Vs Balor.
Tonight, New Day Vs Gallows and Anderson. One member of New Day will be barred, but next, Mark Henry Vs Rusev for the United States Championship.
Moments ago, we see what we just saw, Balor kick Seth.
Tonight, Seth Vs Zayn.
It’s Lana in a white wedding dress, she and Rusev were married this past weekend.
Rusev Vs Henry for the US Title is now.
Rusev defeats Henry with an Accolade. He tells us nobody can take the US Title away from him, and nobody can take Lana from him.
Enter Roman Reigns.
Rusev wants to leave, but Roman won’t let him.
Rusev starts the fight, but Roman finishes it off with a Superman Punch.
Nia Jax video is showing now. She made her Raw debut last week, and she is in action, tonight.
Tomorrow night, on Smackdown Live, we will see the debut of American Alphas. AJ Styles has a message for John Cena.
Darren Young Vs Titus O’ Neil is now.
Titus wins with some tights, rolling him up.
Titus tells Darren it’s not about being great, it’s about winning.
Steph gives Mick a gift, and Sheamus is irate about Foley giving Mark Henry an US Title match, and not Sheamus. Cesaro comes in, and he tells us we don’t care about Sheamus.
Foley tells them that Cesaro has a questionable shoulder, and Sheamus hasn’t been in the game since cashing in Money in the Bank briefcase. He tells both men to face off in the ring, and the winner will receive a future title shot.
Nia Jax is in action, next.
The Cruiserweight Division is coming to Raw.
Mr. Backlund is upset at Titus, he tells him he will knock his old ass out if he doesn’t shut up, Darren lays him out from behind.
Nia Jax will face Ariel Monroe, in the ring.
Nia wins with the Power Slam.
Byron interviews Nia, and asks her how it feels to compete in a Raw ring. Nia goes after Ariel, and she tells Byron to ask her how it feels.
Tom Phillips is with Sami Zayn.
Sami knows Seth, they have battled over the years, but he has one weakness, Seth has a big mouth. Just like the man he battled with in Kevin Owens. He had a match of his life at Battleground, and he beat him. Seth has something to prove? Sami is going to make a statement.
New Day selects a fruit in the basket, it looks like Xavier lost by choosing a banana.
We are live in Atlanta, Georgia.
Brock Lesnar is here.
OHHHHH ATL, IT’S TIME TO STAND UP AND CLAP FOR YOUR WORLD FAMOUS 2-TIME TAG TEAM CHAMPS, AND FEEL THE POWER.
It’s a New Day….yes it is.
Last week, Gallows and Anderson attacked them from behind, so of course who filed a complaint against them? Yup, the bald-headed freaks. So they drew who would wrestle with fruit in a bag, and Atlanta’s own Xavier Woods drew the short end of the stick. They were going to form a penis, with the banana and two peaches, but that wasn’t PG.
So here comes Gallows and Anderson, and we have our match.
New Day win when Gallows and Anderson turned their backs on Big E., and Big E. rolls up Anderson.
Here comes Xavier, but down goes Xavier. Magic Killer, message is sent.
Xavier tries to fight back, but they lay him out too.
Moments ago, we see Gallows and Anderson lay out The new Day after a loss.
It’s Cesaro Vs Sheamus, now.
Cesaro wins with a Neutralizer, Brock Lesnar returns, tonight.
We get a fight between Cesaro Sheamus, and Heath Slater interrupts the fight, with a returning Jinder Mahal.
Mick Foley comes out, informs both men they aren’t a part of Raw roster. But makes a match of Jinder Vs Slater, winner gets a contract from Raw.
Heath refuses, but Jinder gives him a kick for the pinfall victory.
Welcome back to Raw, Jinder Mahal.
Earlier tonight, Cass and Sasha faced Jericho and Charlotte, with Charlotte and Jericho winning.
Tom Phillips is with Jericho. He tells Tom that his scarf was $750, and he has someone watching his back, in case Cass comes out.
Tom wanted to know who, but Chris made up a name. Kevin Owens volunteers his services.
Rollins Vs Zayn is next.
Rollins wins the match with a Pedigree. Good match here that showcased both men.
Paul Heyman comes out, and we will hear from Brock Lesnar, next.
American Alpha debut tomorrow night on Smackdown Live.
Next week, Sean “Puff Daddy” Combs will guest host Raw.
Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Paul Heyman. And I know for the last 3 hours, we have been waiting on the edge of the seats waiting, salivating to see the most box office attraction in combat sports to come out so we can worship. Ladies and gentlemen, the beast incarnant, and the Viper Slayer, Brock Lesnar.
In 3 weeks, it will be Randy Orton Vs Brock Lesnar, at Summerslam.
Ladies and gentlemen, on Sunday night, August 24th, live at the Barclay Center, in WWE Network, his client Brock Lesnar will entertain you. Did Paul Heyman just advocate his client Brock Lesnar will do all things of entertain us? Yes, because Brock has a different form of entertainment than what they run in WWE. Brock is violent, and he can’t say that word. But he can say whatever he wants, because Brock Lesnar is standing right next to him. Brock isn’t here to cement his stamp of the new era, or kiss Mick Foley’s ass. He is here to take out Smackdown Live’s own Randy Orton.
Randy is a third generation superstar, they say he is one step away from a RKO. They say he is one RKo away from shocking the world, just like Brock shocked the world by ending the Wrestlemania steak of The Undertaker.
How does Randy Orton get these thoughts in the head? Maybe it’s the voices he hears? One of those voices might tell Randy he will be taken to Suplex City, and get his ass kicked. If he hears any other voices, that is full of, malarkey.
Let’s just say this again, Brock Lesnar will kick your ass. Randy doesn’t have a chance to win, so let’s just say Randy needs to survive. Because he might not go to the hospital, or maybe he will get a chance to wrestle before the end of 2016. How can he do that? One RKO. Because Randy won’t hit a RKO, he isn’t man enough to hit a RKO.
And just like that, Orton hits a RKO.
He tells Heyman he can do it, and runs off into the crowd, when Foley and Stephanie come out with security.
Orton does his awesome “Legend Killer” pose, as we end the show.
Kevin’s Thoughts:
The show was okay, certainly not as good as last week, but the ending was fantastic. And we are on the way to showcase Lesnar vs Orton. I can’t wait to see what happens tomorrow, when Orton speaks. Will we see Lesnar show up? RKO out of nowhere will give you a ticket to Viperville, anytime.
What were your thoughts on the show? Send them to me here.